no more

Jesus... your majesty puts me in awe....

Its amazing how God works...

when I thought in my morbid state all is bad, I'm reminded of His goodness.

Everything was bad. Had a tiff with my dad, felt the injust where the wrath of his comments was not totally directed at me. Things crumbling, relationships are thin. I doubt and question at every instance. Why? Why now?

Praising God seems like the last item on the list - any human would crumble. Ye of little faith.
The psalmist, Job to name a few - all lamented how long is their day in their adversery. Probably 100 times worst than me.
But at the end, they turn their eyes on the Creator of all things.

Sometimes I ask myself. How can this happen - again, in my life? I'm not as great as those psalmist where they still can say Praise God at the end of their lament...

Read in a book that for Job - everything was difficult. He couldnt understand as well why things happens to him. Doesnt make things better when he has 3 well meaning friends who said things in the wrong time (to some extend).
But at the end, Job still praises God - its the "I dont know why, I'm still going to trust You, because You have brought me so far and hence I can trust You". God had a purpose for that - more than just to put Job through the crisis...

A chinese blog reminded me of that. God Prepares.

Refining me through this fire...



and disclaimer : 1) Honestly, I dont think lamenting means u dont believe in God? Some people see it that way - I've concluded this since what happened last year this time. At some point due to our limited human bandwidth of thoughts, His thoughts are higher than ours, we can be tired and fustrated with things. Of course faith waviers. I dont deny. Its human - its the residue of the fallen human nature. If you ever have a friend in crisis like I am, please be sensitive. Not apathy - SENSITIVE. Go read Job all over again and you'll see something different...
2) This post is incomplete. I have some thoughts in my mind that has yet to organise itself...
3) Really want to thank those people who had to put up with my rants. God bless your patient soul and knowing that its my personality to rant it all out, and then start to rationalise things. You my friends, made things so much easier for me to face my situation and handle it the spritual way. Shalom!

posted by gloomy @ 1:17 AM