no more

I'm afraid...

Im the type of person who sees reality and hope in God co-exist side by side.

Yes - I am afraid. Afraid of trusting people, afraid of getting hurt. Afraid of the what lies ahead. FEAR.

Its a reality we live in a fallen broken world. Its a reality that we have to go through trials and tribulation. As Dr Tan Siang Yang puts it - Jesus' guarantee (the best one in the world in fact) we are sure to go through it [John 16:33a - ... In this world you will have trouble.]. Dr Tan goes on to say thank God for John 16:33b - "But take heart! I have overcome the world." Some version says Be of good cheer, take courage.

Its a reality life sucks. How certain times where we experience great joy. How certain times we have to go through times of berevity, pains of losing a job, aimless life, directionless.

Unfortunately, Im not the kind who writes big fancy things oh Praise God when things are tough. Because pain in life is a reality.
Morbid as it sounds, but being in church so long, it seems more than often that most people jump in to accept those people who belong to the "Praise God even though things are tough" but cannot accept people with the "Marvin" sydrom (aka "Everything is terrible... life is a mess"...). We fail to be able to relate to people who are in those places. Like how this blogger puts in the book review of Larry Crabb's Shattered Dreams - "But we are less comfortable with those whose today's are worse than their yesterday's and who are honest about their pain and confusion - "my life is in a shambles right now and I don't see God anywhere in this situation, as far as I am concerned it looks like He has forsaken me." We prefer piety, even false piety, to honesty." [quoted from : http://jollyblogger.typepad.com/jollyblogger/2004/08/review_of_shatt.html ]

Or the idea of "God only helps those who help themselves". While reading John Piper's book, it kinda dawn on me that that phrase seems to be carrying a hint of new ageism. If a man can help himself to get out of his own pit, then that man need not to have God. What we fail to comprehen here is that God works WITH US. Its not just a one way traffic. We do pray and lift the things we pray to God. But more than often, when there is a need to go into action, we fail to do so. We happily wait for a SIGN or SIGNAL, while the Spirit is already promoting to do something.
There are times where God gives a sign, there are also times where we will see we have to go forth in faith for certain things.

For some wierd reason, this post is coming out well. WAHHAHAH. Thank you God.
I'm getting Larry Crabb's book for sure. Wait till i finish what i have now...

Bottomline is that while people may fail, anything that can go wrong will go wrong, God is still the constant God. My feelings are real. More solid real than gold. Some people may teach the heart is deciteful above all things - hence we cannot depend of feelings and to the extend goes into denying the feeling and telling people to trust God. Yes thats true - but denying your feelings is wrong wrong. Its really discerning when its real, and when its confusion due to the situations.

I think the world is systematic enough. Leave it there. There's more than system in the fellowship. And that they will know that we are christians by our love... (old hymm)... I love hymms~!

posted by gloomy @ 11:07 AM