no more: one of those nights....

Monday, January 09, 2006

one of those nights....

Tonight is one of those freaking irritating nights.

Battling PMS, alongside with some other mudane issues.

One of those nights where I really need someone to talk to, and so happen that most people online that I talk to are some what unavaliable.

Then again, telling anyone doesnt really solve the problem. Still a battle I must fight.

Its pure fustration. I guess all I need was attention? Maybe I'm just deprived from it. My insecurity from young. No matter how much I try, I can never get to be in the first 5 position. I can never get the attention of the teacher on academic studies.

And this hunts me still... insecurity, acceptance. And so many thoughts awakes me at this hour.

HOWEVER, dont get me wrong. It takes time to fully recongise God's acceptance... but yet humanly, dont we all want acceptance and attention?

God is still doing His shaking... and thankfully He is...
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Is it really me being human that I'll feel drained and strained with things? I'm tired to have my mind screwed up with theories and theologys people give/say. Its tiring...

I wonder what its like being normal. Or rather, whats the defination of being normal?

.....

I'm still grateful... I'll rise up to be thankful! And praiseful!

Need to sleep... some more photos to go...
cant take it...argg...

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